You’re not the boss of me

Remember when you were little and somebody tried to tell you what to do? Not a parent or a teacher, not a “real” authority. I’m talking about another kid, a friend or even a sibling. Somebody tried to get all in charge and chances are you told them firmly that they were not the boss of you. Or maybe you were the one ruling the world that day and got that response. Either way, the message was clear. The person saying it wanted to be in charge of his or her own fine self.

Funny how things change.

Roll the years forward and suddenly we’ve got all kinds of adults who don’t want to be the boss of themselves. What do I mean? I mean that apart from the obvious demands of work, of higher authorities that govern our actions to some extent and the very personal acceptance of an ultimate Higher Authority with whom to create life magic and fulfillment, we are absolutely the boss of ourselves. Or we should be.

Because seriously? If we aren’t going to step up and claim responsibility for our choices, our actions and the outcomes that result, who will? Ohhh…wait. That’s it, right? It’s much easier to shift the balance so someone else is responsible. That way, if it doesn’t work out we can pout and sulk and point fingers.

See the thing is, we’ve got to own our stuff. All of it. Otherwise we don’t get to relish the positive outcomes or learn from the challenges. The only way to rock on, rock on with our amazing lives is to actually claim them. And that means the whole big glorious experience. The only way is to be the boss.

How many times have you said or heard someone say that they couldn’t do <whatever> because of forces outside themselves? They couldn’t meet the right person because…and what follows is a list of things that supposedly has nothing to do with the person speaking. They couldn’t pursue an activity or hobby or passion that they really wanted because…there’s the list again. They couldn’t.

Learning to be your own boss starts with the very small things in life. And I do mean very small. Like food choices, daily activities, interactions with others. All those seemingly little choices create a foundation of energy for the much bigger experience.

You’re not the boss of me. Nope, you are not. I am the boss, along with the Creator who I trust to guide my energy in the right direction. Being the boss means it is up to me to greet each day with the attitude I choose to fill my life. It means deciding what I will eat and nourishing my body properly. It means reaching out to and interacting with others in a way that is positive and helpful. It means learning and growing in ways that will benefit my ultimate goal. It means stepping aside from whining and moping and blaming as much as possible and most of all it means being the one to recognize when I have not and taking action to change a negative path.

Being the boss is the most empowering thing I can ever do for myself. As a child, it was simply a way of exerting independence. As an adult?

It’s the only way to embrace a mindful, abundant life. Be the boss of yourself, starting with what seems small and insignificant. If we knew that as children claiming authority over ourselves, we need to embrace the lesson again. And by embracing it, take another step towards true empowerment.

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2 Responses to You’re not the boss of me

  1. Marta Frant says:

    When we feel an urge to give someone advice, we should start with applying this to ourselves first. And I do agree that the small details are vital. Nice post.

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